"There's a bit of magic in everything, and some loss to even things out." -Lou Reed

Friday, April 3, 2009

Did I Say That Out Loud?

We've all been there--sweaty palms, nervous energy, in our best suit: the dreaded job interview. Trying to prepare for all the questions can be nerve-wracking, but thinking of a unique answer that hasn't been used by every other candidate can seem impossible.

Within this list are some we might like to say, but couldn't (or could we?). Either way, you will laugh at many of them, I guarantee it! A warning--a few are a bit naughty. I have only listed the beginning of the list here, click at the bottom to read the full 100.

Help Wanting
100 things not to say in a job interview

1. "Sorry I'm late. I could have sworn you said 'San Francisco.'"

2. "Where I come from, that kind of question will get you shot."

3. "If I smell like Cheez-Its, it's just because I love them so freakin' much."

4. "I don't like to brag about competitive offers—let's just say I've had some interest from a company that rhymes with Flurger Cling."

5. "Does your health plan cover abortion? If so, can I start today?"

6. "My work ethic is so strong, it's practically Asian."

7. "Is Jesus considered a personal reference?"

8. "Would it be possible to be paid in cash? I'm kind of laying low right now."

9. "What in the hell is this Microsoft Word everyone keeps talking about?"

10. "Do me a kindness and scratch beneath my carpal tunnel splints?"

11. "Do you have a speakerphone? My lawyer would like to be involved."

For the list of the full 100 click here.

Photo and article courtesy of www.radaronline.com


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